And quit your job!
Umm, God, did you not see that the only one bringing in money for our family is me?!?! (pride, pride, pride)
I knew that He spoke to my heart and told me to quit my job to go help The Channel. I asked for confirmation and that night he led me to a book on my shelf that I had never read. I opened it up and it said when God asks you to do something difficult do you obey immediately, or do you delay? I also sought "wise counsel" and shared what I felt God was asking me to do and they all agreed I should follow God's prompting.
So I quit. well....sort of. I wanted to make sure the door was still open and my boss wanted me to come back.
You see, I had a back up plan. In my brain I thought, "When this fails, I'll just go back to work and we'll be fine." I didn't have to have full FAITH in God, because I could do it without him. We all have these difficult choices in our lives, whether we are going to rely on ourselves, or if Jesus really is enough.
Jesus asks "Come, Follow Me."
Thank God that I didn't get only one chance to answer that question.
About three months after I had quit my job and I was really leaning on going back to it, I heard a message about Matthew 19:21-23:
"Jesus answered him, If you would be perfect [that is, have that spiritual maturity which accompanies self-sacrificing character], go and sell what you have and give to the poor, and you will have riches in heaven; and come, be My disciple, But when the young man heard this, he went away sad (grieved and in much distress), for he had great possessions. And Jesus said to His disciples, Truly I say to you, it will be difficult for a rich man to get into the kingdom of heaven."
The teacher asked the question after reading this passage: Do you think Jesus is talking to you? Do you think Jesus is talking to most Americans? Do you know where your next 5-7 meals are going to come from, because if so, Jesus is probably talking to you!
The week I had heard that message I decided I was going to make my mind up about returning to work. It felt like this epic moment in my life that if I chose to go back, the rest of my life would be meaningless. But if I would just CHOOSE Jesus and what He asked me to do, then in some crazy way I would have freedom. So I wrestled with the Lord...I prayed, I cried. A couple days later I asked God to just show me what to do...
And God is so faithful to answer prayers. He told me to read Hebrews 11 and as I read he illuminated this scripture:
"If they had been thinking of the country they had left, they would have had opportunity to return. Instead, they were longing for a better country—a heavenly one. Therefore God is not ashamed to be called their God, for he has prepared a city for them."
That was it. I repented for looking back, he had called me to be a part of The Channel. So I called my old boss and told her I wasn't coming back.
